Wednesday, October 2, 2013

Letting Go


Today was one of those days. I came home, grumpy, irritable, negative. I did what I told my students to do – wrote for 10 minutes, just to get it out. It’s rough, but what I needed to say. And I think I need to share it with someone – so here you go.

Letting Go
There are days where I want to scream.
Frustration builds up inside like a cork in a champagne bottle,
Just waiting to pop.
Days where I vacillate between what is “right” in education,
If anything is.

I despair.
How do you fight against something that is bigger than you?
How do you hold fast to what you know to be true?
Where do you find strength?
Allies?
Answers?

I look into the faces of my students and I know,
I know what is right.
I know where the truth lies.
I know what is important.

And yet, I struggle.
Where is the all-knowing body who tells us what to teach?
Since when should an eight-year-old know math this complex?
Who forgot to tell the authors of these standards that not every child is the same?
That not every child learns the same way.
That there is no magic bullet in teaching.
It is an art.
I am the artist.

They need to leave my classroom.

I’m beyond frustrated today.
And yet, I will continue to teach.
I will continue to provide the environment I believe to be best.
I will continue to teach the way I know will reach students.
I will pray that my own children and my students persevere.
I will hope that one-day politicians will leave teaching to teachers.
Because unless you have been one.
Unless you have taught in a classroom.
How can you possibly know how best to reach these students?