Wednesday, September 18, 2019

So Many Open Tabs

How I am choosing to relax tonight, reading a book.
Today I reached lunch hour and raced out the door to my building on my way to my Jeep. My mind going a million miles a minute, I briefly wondered why I felt anxious. As I watched my colleague, Mel, drive home in her car, I thought of Mel’s computer. I constantly tease her that she has too many tabs open. I laughed thinking that was how my brain felt today, there were too many tabs. So many tabs.

I’m not sure if this is a female issue, a teacher issue, or a mom issue, but I always have a lot on my mind. While I am teaching, I’m always thinking in my head that we have “x” amount of time left in class, what I still have to teach, and what connection I can give the kids to the concept I’m sharing. As I do that I’m scanning their faces, deciding who is paying attention, who isn’t, who looks confused, who looks sad and what I can do about it, etc. I read somewhere that a teacher, on average, will make more than 1500 educational decisions in a day. I believe it.

Today, on top of normal teaching, I had a ridiculous amount of other “stuff” on my mind. We were beginning our day with a lockdown and relocation drill. I debated how to lead my students through it without causing any anxiety. I sat there huddled in the corner of our classroom with them and prayed that this was a drill that they would never need to use. During breaks between classes I scheduled a doctor appointment for Luke to ensure he just has a virus and not strep or an ear infection. I communicated said appointment to Luke, my mother-in-law, and Luke’s school for that afternoon. I texted the vet about Rosie’s allergies and made an appointment for her after school. I messaged the mom of Liam’s Homecoming date so that I could go order the flowers during lunch. And Chris and I texted about a low tire pressure on my car.

Throughout the morning when I wasn’t teaching I also sent emails about a few meetings I need to have coming up at school, reached out for information about a fundraiser this spring. Messaged some parents about school concerns, emailed other parents about things I’d noticed, answered some student communication, and got the lessons ready for tomorrow.

In fourth hour we watched Jarrett Krosoczka’s Ted Talk. (HERE) In our discussions and quick write afterwards, we talked about everything Jarrett overcame. I relayed the advice that we should all be kind because we never know what other people are dealing with. Some kids shared some struggles of their own. I thought of everything I’d been juggling all morning as well as a doctor's appointment that was making me nervous for tomorrow afternoon. We decided that we would all try to be just a bit kinder as we moved about our day. 

Side note, this is not exactly what my appointment is regarding, but as my PSA for the day I wanted to share THIS article about women’s health from one of my favorite authors. I think it is important. 

Study hall came and went and then I was rushing out of the building to lunch, all those tabs open as I did. Driving to grab my lunch before heading to the florist, I ran through my morning and laughed thinking of all of those darn “tabs.” I am under no illusion that I am unique in this respect, but today was a great reminder to me to take some time for ourselves. Let our brains slow down once in awhile. Because my goodness, I surely hit 1,501 decisions today, or maybe 1,502. 

Have a great week!

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