Friday, May 17, 2013

Merry-Go-Round


Do you remember merry-go-rounds? Running as fast as you can along side one, the speed would increase. Shrieks would flow out of your friends who were sitting on the platform, you continued to run, trying to keep up, until you knew you just had to let go and watch them speed by. This pretty much sums up my feelings at the end of a school year.

While the start of the year is packed with special events, there is also the quiet time – the ease into what will be our transitions, schedules, patterns. Units are just beginning, I am learning my students, we seem to begin to meld together. I am typically a bit stressed, but also at peace. There is plenty of time left.

The end of the year would be the polar opposite of that feeling. Transitions happen effortlessly. My students know me well, read my body language, and know my mood. Our schedule is packed. I feel like they are being pulled from me for so many different special events when all I really want to do is shut the door, pull up some books, and teach.

Each day the kids come in and ask – What crazy stuff is happening today? I sigh, look at the calendar, read off the new items added to our schedule, and mentally count the days left. Today I announced we had seven and a half days left. A student grinned at me and asked how much I thought I’d cry on that last day as they walked out the door.

Why do you think I’ll cry, I asked.

Because you’re eyes have watered every day this week when you’ve told us how many are left.

Allergies, I said.

And they all laughed.

Today’s over. Six and a half more. They are all on the merry-go-round, and I’m barely holding on as I run along beside them. I know I need to let go, but I just can’t. Yet. 
 
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